October 12, 2003

the case for nite-lights

the way i see it, there’s a subtle difference between a nightmare and a scary dream. a scary dream is the one in which your life is in grave danger (is there another kind?) but it’s kind of an unrealistic situation and you have a vague notion that you’re going to be able to wake up. when you finally do, it’s 3 a.m. you turn on the light, make sure the bedroom door is locked, and are perfectly content to pull the covers over your head and risk suffocation while trying to stay awake until daylight. oh, and the dog looks at you like you’re insane and goes back to sleep immediately.

a nightmare is the dream in which something conceivably realistic happens to you, totally turning your life upside down. when you wake up, you’re not sure of anything, and have to call either your mother, brother, or best friend at 3 a.m. to find out what they can tell you about yourself. the dog’s reaction is the same to this one as it is to the scary dream, so don’t use her expression to distinguish between the two.

last summer, i had a series of scary dreams in which i lived through horror movies i hadn’t seen yet. they were: Signs, Hannibal, Jason X. the same thing happened this summer with: Jeepers Creepers 2 and Freddy vs. Jason. hey, Jason may seem harmless on screen, but when that guy’s chasing you through a botanical garden in broad daylight, you won’t be laughing.

last nite i had the second scariest nightmare in the history of me. what happened? i got fired and didn’t know what to do! i was running out of money and thinking about moving back to PA … woke up in a cold sweat.

i had the best nightmare ever when i was in high school … dreamed i was an addict. i walked around until lunch totally paranoid, expecting to need a fix at any moment, and worried about how withdrawal was going to affect getting into college. it was great. i can hardly wait for another crisis.

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